A Non-Exhaustive List of Things That Are Better Than Buying Plane Tickets, In No Particular Order

  1. Buying train tickets
  2. Buying bus tickets
  3. Buying tickets for a (currently-nonexistent) luxury dirigible
  4. Going outside and realizing you forgot your scarf/sunglasses/umbrella and having to decide whether or not to go back inside
  5. Letting a tea bag steep too long
  6. Realizing you forgot to wash the that you meant to wear tomorrow and you spilled something on them so you can’t even just Febreze them and pretend they’re clean
  7. Any and all pickles
  8. When someone forgets to clear the microwave
  9. Hairless cats
  10. Most alien invasions
  11. Talking to someone but not being able to remember their name
  12. Dropping your deodorant on the bathroom floor, where it breaks into several dozen shower-fresh
  13. Wrong numbers
  14. Spelling the word “embarrassing”
  15. Couch cushions that slowly slide further out of place every time you sit on them
  16. Stale french fries
  17. Buying vegetables and then forgetting them in the fridge drawer
  18. Every member of the band One Direction
  19. The cookie part of an Oreo
  20. Thursdays
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